tuk-tukin' round the YOOT

So I've lived in Ayutthaya (pronounced uh-YOOT-tai-yaaa, and affectionately nicknamed The YOOT ) for almost 4 months now, so i figured it was about time i saw all the sights. with a friend in town and the sun shining, i finally had an excuse to be a tourist in my own city.

Kassem was our tuk tuk driver and tour guide for the day, and quite frankly, he was The Man. he spoke Thai with us - clearly and slowly - and somehow perfectly estimated how much we knew, because at all the right moments he would slip into a very articulate english.  "dern chaa chaa bundai jet sip gao ... around the back of the gold chedi behind the stupa... hen buddha suay maag". Not only did we understand HIS thai, but HE understood OUR thai - which is an amazing accomplishment in this little city.

In our further Thai-glish conversations with Kassem, we found out he was quite the ladies man,  also enjoyed rice whiskey, and wouldn't stop teasing me when my face got red after drinking a beer (damn asian flush).

of all the sights in ayutthaya, the reclining buddha is my favorite.This buddha is one of my favorite poses in general, where Buddha is about to die after his lifelong meditative battle with earthly suffering, escape samsara [reincarnation] and enter into nirvana [kind of like heaven, but not].

i find Ayutthaya's RB more beautiful than the more famous one in Bangkok's Wat Pho, mainly because you can actually see the whole thing at one time, and its not obtructed by pillars, nor contained by ceilings. It's just chillin' under the clouds, his orange robe wafted by wind, gold stickers sparkling in sunlight. He is relaxed and reclined, about to enter into the sweet blissful state of nirvana, and his expression captures this perfectly. his smile is sneaky and mysterious like the Mona Lisa, but definately at peace, euphoric with spiritual detachment and looking forward to his future liberation. he just looks so... content. almost smug. i love it.

Side Note: This is perhaps the reason why I prefer temples and buddhas over churches and crosses. Tell me the last time you were in a church surrounded by images of Jesus looking smug.... (never. its depressing.)

Another noteworthy temple of the Yoot is Wat Phu Khao Thong, an impressive chedi consisting of 79 steps but a rather bland extertior. While the name means "Golden Mount", it is actually white. More like dirty gray. But endure the 79 step walk up, and on the base of the chedi you will find a very small door, about 4 feet high, like something from Alice and Wonderland. It leads you down an equally shallow hallway, and there you will discover something amazing. Deep inside this pyramid there is small, clostrophobic room, 20 degrees hotter than it is outside, stuffy and... sparkling. It covered with glitter and gold, including a magnificent ruby Buddha unlike i've ever seen.

A monk was sitting quietly in the "room" already, but it was more like a closet. With only me, Eva, and the monk, the space was packed, the unmoved air stuffy with incense and farang sweat. Overcome with sparkling idols, I bowed to the ruby Buddha and humbly excepted a gift of sacred thread (yet another) and a blessing from the resident monk.

Our trip around Ayutthaya was tireless, but somehow visiting temples always leaves me rejuvenated and propitious. The city of Ayutthaya, it turns out, is much like the Golden Temple itself. As an outside observer,  it may look simply old and dusty. But look closer, and you will find a history deep as it is dirty, and full of beauty and blessings  in the most unexpected places.

Haiku Friday

On a Thursday! Lucky you.

On Thailand........


Full Moon over sand

buckets of booze all abound

Douchebag Paradise



***


"An iced coffee, please"

But when it reaches my lips

Am I drinking cake?





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Tuk-Tuk twenty baht

black exhaust smells quite noxious

I need a SARS mask




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Sunburnt robes layered

Your bright curtain engulfs you

What lies underneath?





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A sweet, sticky clump

of coconut and white rice

with mango, I drool






On American Politics.....


Since when is war Peace?

A surge of violence out East

Barack, earn your prize



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Yo, Copenhagen!


This blue planet needs healing


Stop fucking around



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GITMO still open



Black hoods and jumpsuits I wore


their Justice denied

F U, ELEPHANT

Warning: profanity ahead. Inspired by the hilarious www.FUPenguin.com

So of course I thought Joe was joking when he said that you could play the harmonica better than me! You’re an elephant, for Christ’s sake. I assumed that because I have lips, I have the ability to blow air into little aluminum crevices better than you. You only have that that long-ass nose you grab bananas with…. And yet apparently this is superior to my pathetic little human mouth and chubby but conveniently mobile fingers.

IT WASN’T ENOUGH that I’ve spent my ENTIRE MUSICAL CAREER coming in second place to Asians . But no, second chair violinists and 3rd place piano player to the human Asian race wasn’t enough. Now I’m surpassed by the Asian ELEPHANT? On the least-complex instrument ever? You don't even have a TIGER MOM. You have got to be kidding me.

And you HAD to throw in that little dance routine, didn’t you? Rub salt in my white, untalented, callused wounds, why don’t you????

Now, not only am I embarrassed, I owe Joe ten beers. Ten of your own GD “Chang” Beers – you self promoting, big-earred whore. F U, Asian Elephant. For being so god damn adorable with your charming musical ability…. And reminding me how much a suck at life. Thanks a lot.

The Frugal Traveler: 36 Hours in Tak Province

Lonely Planet: Thailand aka The Backpackers Bible, refers to Tak as "particularly uninteresting", only including it in the book because "you might get stuck here".

I first came to the city intentionally (if only to meet up with some friends), but ironically, did actually "get stuck" there my second night, after finding out the buses didn't go to Mae Sot on the King's Birthday. Fortunately, Lonely Planet's review of this city may be an unfair write-off of hidden gem in Northern Thailand. While it doesn't have any outstanding "sites" per se, it does have some scenic river views ...and frozen cocktails. Throw in some bicycles to scoot around in, and the company of 4 wonderful people, and this city is worth more than a night passing through....

Whatever reason brings you to Tak, be sure to stay at the incredibly character-building Mae Ping Hotel. You might recognize the bathrooms from horror films such as SAW I-V and Hostel, as I'm pretty sure they were all filmed within these drippy, rustic tile walls. * Also, it's good to know that if the villians from these films ever did show up here, the rock-hard pillows could be used as lethal weapons.... seriously.

Those late nights watching Iron Chef at 4am in America will pay off when you visit Hot Pot the next afternooon for an endless buffet of creative soup conoctions - boiled cow stomach, bok choy... maybe some sushi... then of course don't forget the redbean and corn desserts. If you can even bare to stand up after this feast , exit the back into ... the Arcade!!! Watch out for air-hockey pucks that come flying towards your face.

Later, use the rickety Indiana Jones bridge to cross the Me Nam Ping, drink some beers on the "beach", shoot some fireworks if you got 'em, and watch wild horses toss their trainers into the sand.

Steal some bikes from your friends apartment to visit lesser known sites such as the Shrine to King Thaksin, the nameless road-side vegan restaurant (!!!), and then sit by the river and watch the Thais play on the newly-famous Tak tree swing, or effortlessly catch gigantic fish for dinner without so much as a fishing pole.

After the sun goes down, wander around the Night Market for an authentic eating and shopping experience. And while every city in Thailand has a night market to peruse- not every city has the friendliest roti lady in Thailand, or a VW Bus serving mysterious coffee drinks out of its side door.....

When it comes down to it, I guess it's the simple pleasures, the hot food, and the good company that allows you to open up and enjoy an otherwise average , middle-sized city in the center of Thailand. But next time you're traveling to Mae Sot, Um Phang, or Sukhothai... forget what the Bible says... and make sure to "get stuck" in Tak.

send cash! and cookies!

My address until March:

Casimira Younger
Udomrat Residence, Room 403
11/10 Naresuan Road
T. Pratoochai
A. Phranakorn Si Ayutthaya
Ayutthaya, Thailand 13000

welcome to sin city

Prostitution and "sex-tourism" are booming all over Thailand, but Pattaya seems to be the mecca for such a trade; it is still the Navy-boy hot spot that it was 30 years ago, and now excels at drawing old, fat, perverted men from all over the world (mainly Eastern Europe) to join the young soldiers in their sexcapades. Go-go bars and caberets line the streets, and overweight white men walk hand in hand with atttractive young Thais.

Prostitution is an ever-present evil that goes (surpringly) unchallenged in this country. Thai men and women [seem to] tolerate its presence, and even the farangs I work with claim it's "no big deal", saying things "are just different here"......

It's hard for me not to see the blatant injustice by objectifying, selling, and abusing women, not to mention its ties to the wider issues of third-world poverty and gender inequality, so I don't exactly accept the vindication of culturally-moral relativism. While prostitution is technically "illegal" in Thailand, anyone that takes a stroll down Walking Street will immediately recognize that not only is it legal, but flourishing, acceptable, and highly profitable.

Prostitution's presence in a society that is not only devout Buddhist, but also prudish and conservative in many respects , is one of the many paradoxes that keeps Thailand interesting. For this reason alone, and because I didn't want to be downer all weekend, I swallowed my liberal snobbery and heavy judgement, and became an accepting observer in the City of Sin this weekend.





they don't call it "International Meeting Street" for nothing

3,000 lanterns, 1 night.

these are fire lanterns, not stars.

As we watched 3,000 of them get released at the same time from the temple grounds, it was hard to remember what exactly reality was, where we were, and how we got there. Perhaps we had been transported into some astronomical dream on another world entirely. It was something inbetween outer space and lower levels of ocean floor: a dark place only visited by strange, bright and tiny creatures, glowing and scattered like stars, jellyfish, or Christmas lights, but with melodic Buddhist chants humming in the background. The lanterns, some attached with their own set of fireworks, caused them to skyrocket, mirroring shooting stars, but only feet away; beautiful, sparkling, and incredibly dangerous. The lanterns rose with grace, sent with blessings of hope and thanksgiving, and drifted towards other realms of the atmosphere, taken into Other hands. You could see the mass of them rise together and change directions, pulling west, then some, having already lost their fire, slowly floated down again.

Me: I think I've figured it all out. This ceremony is just symbolic of the cyclical nature of life and death, of karma and samsara. Of our beauty and yet our individual insignificance.
Brandon: Oh, really? I thought it was just about man's obsession with lighting shit on fire.

Either way, it blew my mind.